Archive for June, 2005


Why not?

June 7, 2005

Having had a few discussions recently with people who read this blog, and feeling some need to explain why I have not been updating, made me realize that I tend not to update out of fear.

The fear comes from the belief that what I write is not that interesting and that anyone reading it must see that as well. To be fair, I don’t want to ever disrespect the intelligence of my readers, so I know they can determine what is good and what is not.

That means it is all in my head. Damn my head.

I am in Orlando for Microsoft TechEd. If you are in the technology business you know what this is like. I can proudly say, however, that today went by without my consuming any alcohol and being ready for bed by 11:30 (a few minutes from now). This is a good accomplishment. Since the amazing people I work with have this show 100% buttoned up (buttoned down?), I am pretty much useless. I meet and greet and pontificate, but Tanya and Harry built this ship. They are sailing it smoothly.

To everyone that came to the wonderful Samba party the other night — thank you. It was a lot of fun and I always enjoy meeting with people and getting an opportunity to experience first hand the bright and interesting people that inhabit my universe.

The down side to all of this, and the thing that is blackening my mood, is that on the trip here I had two of my watches stolen from my checked bag. One of those watches was both very special and fairly expensive. Special enough that replacing it might not mean the same thing to me, and expensive enough that I really can’t afford to replace it right now. So, it just pushed me down into a fairly black hole of self-pity and despair. I feel violated, as all of us do when robbed. But, the more predominant feeling is just utter hopelessness and futility. Some of the things associated with the lost watch play into my past and the good and bad found there. It is not fair of me to my teammates and friends to be so down when everyone is having a great time. We are here to deliver value to our customers and partners and I need to focus on that.

Good night.

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